Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity, Jig

The miles between here and Minnesota are always felt hard when flying. I usually do a non-stop flight. This time I flew Southwest Airlines. Yes, it was another flight of Minneapolis to Salt Lake City via China. No, just kidding - it just felt like it!

Back to the reality of being a working woman. There is comfort in a regular schedule. I'm grateful sometimes for the familiar things that are always there - like laundry, dishes and toilets to clean. It's the things you can do without thinking. Seriously, sometimes they can be a real blessing in our lives.

I, Cindy, having been born of goodly parents...

Yes, I recently started reading the Book of Mormon again. I only got to the first sentence and I was pondering. I often find myself saying...I am the luckiest of mothers or the luckiest of daughters, sisters...on and on. Even though I've had so much time to prepare for the loss of my father, I've decided in someways one can never really prepare. It is like so many things in life. You take a big breath and walk through it.

Sitting at the Memorial last Saturday in the Princeton Ward Chapel, which was full of family and friends, I was overcome with memories, love, gratitude, and feeling the presence of my father. Everyone was so kind, so understanding of the feeling of loss yet relief he is no longer hurting. Ed Hunt spoke and I realized the friendship he and my father shared was a wonderful treasure. Another friend of 50 or so years shared his tender feelings. Uncle Ronnie (one of the many "adopted" relatives) made us laugh while our minds were full of memories we all shared.

I'm so grateful for my parents. My life could have gone so many different directions. The one thing I treasure most is feeling like I'm "on track". My parent's example helps me to seek that out. Living by the spirit. Enduring to the end. Seeking the light.

Oh, how I will miss my Knight in Shining Armor.

Life is Fragile

I love my little sister very much. April is an "angel". She is always doing things for every else. She is impossible to keep down for long. I came in early to Minnesota as she was to have some "same day surgery" on Tuesday. Well, that ended up more exploratory surgery and she has received the news that she has endometrial cancer. I don't like the "C" word. I don't think anyone does. It threw us all into one of those moments where you feel like you are in slow motion and everything of the momment is imbedded into your mind. With it also came quickly the strength that comes from hope. April had received a blessing that told her all would be well. She is a fighter. I am here for only a few days, but already the sense of family is strengthening us all. Prayers, faith, hope and humor. We awoke this morning with determination. We had a list of errands and so we spent the morning together, April, my mother and I. Driving here and there. Laughing and crying together. These moments together are so few - so precious. We don't know what lies ahead for my sis, but I do know she is loved and watched over on both sides of the veil. I find deep comfort in knowing Daddy is ever so close. The days to come will reveal more. We pray for strength and treasure the time together...because we all know just how fragile this life is.

Fifth Grade Concert

Today I had the wonderful opportunity of attending the Fifth grade concert for my two nieces. Sometimes being an "out-of-state" auntie is very difficult for me. To be here and watch them perform today was awesome for me! I even made April take a picture - proof I was really in Minnesota with them. Aren't they the cutest girls! :)

Minnesota

Southwest flies to Minnesota now but It takes all day and you go by way of China. You think I'm kidding - don't you? I also needed Laurel's parking karma because when when we got to Minnesota there was no place to "park". The pilot had to keep circling (don't worry, we circled down over Iowa!) The weather was really bad and too many planes were trying to do the same thing we were - LAND! You know I'm desperate when I ask for a parachute. And I was serious. I had recently watched the NCIS episode...I didn't care what the results would be. I just was in a claustrophic, legs feel folded up under me for too long state of mind. The 17-year olds sitting by me thought it was a good idea too. That's actually what snapped me back to reality.

I've travelled to Minnesota for my father's memorial service. And speaking of reality... The house feels so empty and yet so full of my father. I finally figured it out last night. It is empty of his physical sense of being but his spirit is here. The only way I've ever been able to express this feeling is that it is like an umbrella. His protection, his love enveloping the house. I have tried to prepare for the reality of his passing. I decided there was no way and the closer I got to home, I told myself to just relax and feel and gave myself permission for whatever came.

With each moment, I'm just grateful for the gospel and for my father's example. I have found one common thread as we've all talked about dreams we've had of him. He is whole. My mother says he embraces her in her dreams with two arms. Oh, how happy he must be to feel whole. His body may have held him back in this life but his spirit has always soared. For so long his body was riddled with the effects of polio. He fought hard to do so much in this life. I am in constant awe of all that he has done. I am the luckiest and most blessed of daughters.

Serious Placemat Problem

So, Laurel was setting the table for Sunday dinner. She wanted placemats AND she wanted to use the placemats from when they were kids. Yes, each of the kids had their own placemat - you know it was one of those things that they got to pick out and it saved on quarrels and proclaimed their SPOT at the table. We do interesting things as parents to keep the peace, don't we?

Well, anyway, Laurel declared we had a "problem"...Brian doesn't have a placemat!!! Apparently, we have a new way that people are declared an official member of the Cindy Swenson Family. So...do I have to let Brian "pick" out his placemat? Oh, how I wish that this was my only problem for the day!!!!

So, often while I'm at the computer cute little Millie (my grandchild) has to be right next to me or being held. One day when she was being very persistent, I finally just brought her little bed and plopped it on the counter next to me. She happily slept - periodically looking up at me to make sure I was still there. She is a very cute little Chiweenie and has brought much joy to our lives. She definitely is Laurel's "child" however, is being spoiled by her "grandma" --ME! She loves to go on walks and in the car. I never thought I'd ever be one of those women with a dog in her purse...but the older I get the less I care what others think! Which probably means I'm getting healthier mentally as I grow older! So this post is in honor of my Silly Millie Girl who is basking in a spot of sun as I type.